Sunday, May 16, 2010

Birmingham Pt. 2: Friends

We like to "Bro"-down in the B-Ham.  I've got lots of bros and we always put them before least some of us.  I am a frequent violator of this sacred rule, but its only cause I'm an idiot and don't know when to stop thinking with my dick.  Duane and I have "Bro"-ed down on many occasions and here recently we've been kickin' it quite a bit. 

I don't live in Birmingham any more so I really don't know whats going on in the area and I just kind of show up un-announced at peoples houses expecting a couch to sleep on.  I've realized that that's pretty rude now so I try not to do that...instead I stumble back and sleep on their front porch in one of the many ironic pieces of furniture outside without them knowing.  D-Bo and I had a grand ol' time the other night and I learned a lot about myself... being that I have a huge yapper and need to keep it shut more often than not.  I guess all's well that ends well.  That being said take a look at this:
This is K-Wild ( A.K.A Kyle ) after a 10 round bout with booze and a knuckle sandwich.  Kyle tends to get a little violent when he puts his mind to it and his mouth to the bottle.  Moon and I had the pleasure of babysitting ol' bloody tits after he got socked in the face.  The excess blood from this relatively minor injury was due to Kyle not quite grasping the concept of clotting, and subscribing to the classic snot rocket theory of nasal leakage didn't make things much easier.  It didn't work too good for my shirt or Moon's back seat either.  He was stoked on the photos and this one turned out the best.  Kyle is currently traveling with his tail between his legs to California with his assailant.  Let this be a lesson:  Don't let brosephs punch your other brosephs.  Keep the dirty hippies.

So Moon is a badass.  He's bounced back from some pretty heavy shit, and now with the help of J-Harb ( Josh ) they have combined forces to become the most annoying and kind hearted duo in existence.  They are literally the two most genuine people on the planet and will actually give your the shirt off their back to keep you warm at night.  I've seen em' do it!  When I got my pit tatty-d Josh said, " I'd get tattooed in my armpit to see what it feels like.  Thats WILD!  I bet it hurts man. Creighton, you are a bad ass dude.  I really respect you."  This is what happened after we harassed him for about an hour:
 Josh got a peeerrrty little heart right up in there, which is more that most people can say.  Chauncey is possibly the most famous of the Bros.

He's definitely the most popular his dashing good looks gives him an uncanny ability to move from one social group to the next.  He smells great... so he literally has to turn down sex from ladies all the time.  I have seen him do this on more than one occasion, and it may be the most amazing thing that I have ever witnessed.  Chauncey is killin' em' softly.  He's gonna be an engineer in a couple of years, and a damn good one.  He's smart as a whip and probably the stingiest mother fucker in the world.  He's gonna be healthy, wealthy, and wise.  Wellll maybe not so healthy since all he eats is Vienna Sausages and lemon pepper chicken, but he'll be loaded for sure, but he's only 19 so he's got a little time.  Mr. Kirk was my teen idol.  I looked up to him since the day I met him.
      He shreds terror on a skateboard and him and his little lady are movin' out to the land of fame and sex to live the dream.  So rather than save Kraig has a talent for C-Lo.  He gets buckets of duckets off unsuspecting new jacks all the time. 

Hopefully he'll be working with Stuart out at Black Box and get the shred the gnar on the reg.  Me and Stuart are kindred spirits...or we both have cameras.  Either way my picture turned out cooler, but Kyle's grill turned out the worst.

Stuart just kinda left about a year ago to skate in California.  He's puttin in a lot of work and I think he's been making a name for himself.  Hopefully he'll make it big one of these days, and from what I've heard about him its pretty feasible.

You know I love you Birmingham, but I think we need to go on a break for a while.  You know?  It's best for the both of us.  How do you expect this to work out in the end if you don't give me the space I need?  Don't cry.  I'll be back, but I'm not sure things will be the same.  You only live once.  

Birmingham Pt. 1 : Family

I am from Birmingham.  Birmingham is where my friends and family live.  I love them all.  My mom and dad will probably live here for the rest of their lives.

I think they like it here I think, but I don't really know if they can remember living anywhere else.  My mom grew up in Pittsburgh until she moved to Alabama and met my father when she was in college.  They married kind of young which my mother has now recently advised me against, but I think it turned out for the best.   My two younger brothers still live in Birmingham but that won't last for long.

Jacob is going to Auburn for college in a few months.  Hopefully he'll enjoy his "college" experience and make it out unscathed.  He's going to join a frat.  I know nothing about that side of college except that most of the frat guys were scumbags.  I just hope he'll have the common sense to not turn out like another cookie cuter drone.  Andrew just got a ridiculous internship and hopefully he'll be making some bank this summer.  He just passed his insurance sales exam so he's well on his way to success.  Pops doesn't think the idea of being an insurance salesman is too useful, but Andrew has enough people skills to move some policies out the door.  Apparently the last intern made $90,000, which is uncommon, but I think Andrew is going to do pretty good for himself.     My grandparents are getting old.  They raised 5 kids here and will be leaving lasting legacy.


 My grandfather was a dentist for ACIPCO when he first started working in Birmingham, and eventually he opened his own practice in Brookwood.  My grandmother taught children to read in the inner city until she retired.  Now my grandfather is retired.  I know they will both be gone soon, and I am going to miss them.  I guess it helps to accept that they don't have much time left.  My mimi has been struggling with Parkinson disease and cancer for the past 10 years, and my grandfather isn't in the best health anymore either.  I don't really know what to do except spend time with them and try to preserve their stories.  My Yiayia ( Greek for grandmother ) on my mothers side live here too.

   Yiayia is greek.  100% greek.  Her mom came straight off the boat from the old country.  She makes the most delicious food I've ever tasted, and I will miss it when I move....realllllly miss it.  At every family gathering she would prepare a feast that was more delicious than the last.  My absolute favorite thing she makes is macaroni and cheese.  It not too salty and it not too cheesy.  Its the best, and hopefully one of these days she'll teach me how to make it.   I being a recent college graduate have a new goal to get the flying fuck out of town.

Hopefully my plans to work on an oil rig and see the world will pan out and I'll get to see the world finally.  I could potentially be working a month on followed by a month of vacation in which I'd travel the world, but I'm not sure how feasible that really is.  I'd like not to have an apartment and just live out of a backpack and do it up proper.  I guess we'll see what happens in the next few months.