Sunday, May 16, 2010

Birmingham Pt. 2: Friends

We like to "Bro"-down in the B-Ham.  I've got lots of bros and we always put them before least some of us.  I am a frequent violator of this sacred rule, but its only cause I'm an idiot and don't know when to stop thinking with my dick.  Duane and I have "Bro"-ed down on many occasions and here recently we've been kickin' it quite a bit. 

I don't live in Birmingham any more so I really don't know whats going on in the area and I just kind of show up un-announced at peoples houses expecting a couch to sleep on.  I've realized that that's pretty rude now so I try not to do that...instead I stumble back and sleep on their front porch in one of the many ironic pieces of furniture outside without them knowing.  D-Bo and I had a grand ol' time the other night and I learned a lot about myself... being that I have a huge yapper and need to keep it shut more often than not.  I guess all's well that ends well.  That being said take a look at this:
This is K-Wild ( A.K.A Kyle ) after a 10 round bout with booze and a knuckle sandwich.  Kyle tends to get a little violent when he puts his mind to it and his mouth to the bottle.  Moon and I had the pleasure of babysitting ol' bloody tits after he got socked in the face.  The excess blood from this relatively minor injury was due to Kyle not quite grasping the concept of clotting, and subscribing to the classic snot rocket theory of nasal leakage didn't make things much easier.  It didn't work too good for my shirt or Moon's back seat either.  He was stoked on the photos and this one turned out the best.  Kyle is currently traveling with his tail between his legs to California with his assailant.  Let this be a lesson:  Don't let brosephs punch your other brosephs.  Keep the dirty hippies.

So Moon is a badass.  He's bounced back from some pretty heavy shit, and now with the help of J-Harb ( Josh ) they have combined forces to become the most annoying and kind hearted duo in existence.  They are literally the two most genuine people on the planet and will actually give your the shirt off their back to keep you warm at night.  I've seen em' do it!  When I got my pit tatty-d Josh said, " I'd get tattooed in my armpit to see what it feels like.  Thats WILD!  I bet it hurts man. Creighton, you are a bad ass dude.  I really respect you."  This is what happened after we harassed him for about an hour:
 Josh got a peeerrrty little heart right up in there, which is more that most people can say.  Chauncey is possibly the most famous of the Bros.

He's definitely the most popular his dashing good looks gives him an uncanny ability to move from one social group to the next.  He smells great... so he literally has to turn down sex from ladies all the time.  I have seen him do this on more than one occasion, and it may be the most amazing thing that I have ever witnessed.  Chauncey is killin' em' softly.  He's gonna be an engineer in a couple of years, and a damn good one.  He's smart as a whip and probably the stingiest mother fucker in the world.  He's gonna be healthy, wealthy, and wise.  Wellll maybe not so healthy since all he eats is Vienna Sausages and lemon pepper chicken, but he'll be loaded for sure, but he's only 19 so he's got a little time.  Mr. Kirk was my teen idol.  I looked up to him since the day I met him.
      He shreds terror on a skateboard and him and his little lady are movin' out to the land of fame and sex to live the dream.  So rather than save Kraig has a talent for C-Lo.  He gets buckets of duckets off unsuspecting new jacks all the time. 

Hopefully he'll be working with Stuart out at Black Box and get the shred the gnar on the reg.  Me and Stuart are kindred spirits...or we both have cameras.  Either way my picture turned out cooler, but Kyle's grill turned out the worst.

Stuart just kinda left about a year ago to skate in California.  He's puttin in a lot of work and I think he's been making a name for himself.  Hopefully he'll make it big one of these days, and from what I've heard about him its pretty feasible.

You know I love you Birmingham, but I think we need to go on a break for a while.  You know?  It's best for the both of us.  How do you expect this to work out in the end if you don't give me the space I need?  Don't cry.  I'll be back, but I'm not sure things will be the same.  You only live once.