Friday, November 19, 2010

Born on the Bayou

CCR is from Berkley, CA.  They know nothing of the swamps or the creatures that come from them.  New Orleans is pretty much the swampy-est city I've ever been to.  The similarities are never ending.  The local inhabitants are spooky as hell, the stench isn't going away, and at night is when the ooogadie-boogadies come out.  Chauncey and I decided to take a trip and visit my friend Kierstin.  She lives in the Lower 9th ward which is a lot like a 3rd World country, but with more drinking.  We were going to be in town for Halloween Weekend.
 We slept in a tent in the back yard of Kierstin's house with the lovely dog turds and beer bottles.  The house was a step below crust lord layer, but only because they had to pay rent.  There were about 20 people living in the house at the time so it was pretty hectic.  Most of the roomies were nice, but to some our gear wasn't crusty enough.  I think Chauncey fit right in though.
We went in the morning to the French Quarter.  It was about a 4 mile walk, but along the way we met a nice old lady who told us stories about smoking hash in Greece and going to prison.  We helped her get her cat into her car and she was nice enough to tell us some more stories as she drove us to the Quarter.  Some of them were off the wall.  Apparently her friend had been to hell and back and written a book.  From what we've gathered the abortion doctors and the gays got it the worst, and Broseph Stallin is still laughing about all the people he killed.  It was a very eventful 3 miles.

   The next day Kierstin took us out the the swamp.  Chauncey wanted to kill some alligators since he had recently become a fan of the t.v. show "Swamp People".  We probably saw about 8 alligators in all. At first we were convinced they were fake, but after one flinched when we hit it with a stick we were believers.


After a few hours and some snacks it was time to watch the Ol' Timey bands preform at St.Roch's Tavern.  Stumps The Clown among others put on a pretty good show.  Chauncey and I decided to use alternative transportation.  We only had one bike and that only meant one thing...nut to but.


 It was fun to see people playing saws and washboards and gettin down with a kazoo.  Once that wound down it was time for the Bounce Dance Party.  Bounce is the specific beat that the swampy women with armpit hair love to shake their asses to.  It was totally amazing to see the crust punks and hot-jams team united in a clothed orgy.  There were tons of amazing costumes as well.  Chauncey's luscious hair was very sought after from the punk rock womens.  However he was slightly confused by the large quantities of hair they had on their under arms, but once you put a few drinks in Chauncey he doesn't complain about it really.  We had to ride 2 up back from the bar.  Chauncey was too inebriated to be homophobic and I was able to rest my tooshy comfortably upon his testicles.  We decided we'd sleep in the neighbors back yard this night to avoid the harshly judgmental crust lord gear police.  We awoke in the morning and said our goodbyes and headed home.

Oak Trees and Black Metal


Kierstin


Orb Weaver/Wizard 


Swampy Swamp Swamp




Dance Party


Neon Jesus